Tinder is how I met my partner, and I'm not ashamed of it.

 

'Wow, you're bold to reveal you and your boyfriend met on Tinder,' someone recently told me.

Brave?

Not at all.

I don't believe there's something remarkable or daring about stating the truth that makes my connection any less legitimate or real - or at least shouldn't.

However, it appears that there is for certain people.

Because there appears to be a stigma attached to using dating apps and meeting people online, this is the case. And other couples are adamant about not admitting that's how they met their partner. But I'm not embarrassed or ashamed to admit that we would have never met if it weren't for Tinder's tiny elves.

And I believe that dating apps are a fantastic innovation when used responsibly and with good intentions.

So, what exactly is the source of this stigma? Is it true that Tinder relationships are equally as'real' as those formed outside of the internet?

Online dating has existed for quite some time.

'Oh, we met via friends,' or 'We met at a party or a gym,' are the most common falsehoods I've seen people tell instead of admitting they met online.' Choosing more traditional and socially acceptable 'how we met' situations, in other words.

Why is it that meeting someone in the internet dating scene is still regarded unusual?

It's not as if internet dating was developed last year and is a brand-new concept. For a long time, we've been using internet websites and apps. Kiss.com, the oldest dating site, was founded in 1995. It's true that Tinder didn't entirely transform the online dating experience until 2013, but it's been over 10 years since then.

According to recent data, 30% of US individuals have tried internet dating, with 12% finding a serious relationship as a result of their efforts. And, given how the number of individuals using dating apps rises year after year, it's realistic to anticipate that most people will be using them shortly.

Given all that has happened in the globe over the last year, online dating services and apps are a terrific method to meet and interact with people. It was probably the only chance to meet someone for several months while we were all cooped up in our houses.

Even as we slowly recover from the epidemic, finding love in cyberspace makes a lot of sense in our busy and sometimes lonely society.

And looking for someone to connect with is no longer a last-ditch attempt.

It's not pitiful to use Tinder or other applications.

I wasn't seeking for anything serious when I first started using Tinder; I simply wanted to have some fun and meet new people. But when I told my friends about it, they thought it was terrible and made you look like a desperate loser who couldn't find anyone in real life.

That's insane.

Prior to downloading the app, I went on a lot of dates with folks I met the "conventional" manner - at parties, through common acquaintances, and so on.

And, to be honest,

The 'Tinder method' appealed to me more.

It just made it easy for me to determine whether or not the individual with whom I'm conversing via an app is worth my time. It makes it more efficient in some ways. You may also conduct some digging around on their social media accounts to make sure they aren't terrible news if you have their contact information.

Dating apps have been a godsend for my partner, who is a bit of an introvert nerd. I'm sure he wouldn't have an easy time approaching someone at a party and asking them out. That's all right. I admire his introversion and the way he conducts himself. That is something I would not alter for the world.

And, to be honest, I think meeting someone via an app is just as romantic as meeting someone in the'real' world. Because both individuals must make an effort to desire to meet someone, and it's not as simple as it may appear to establish such a relationship only through texts or phone conversations. To reach to the point of asking each other out, it takes days, if not weeks, of conversing.

None of this, however, is humiliating, shameful, or pitiful.

Human connection and love connections are perhaps the most basic of all sentiments. If there's no other method to meet someone, why not attempt the internet world's magic?

Tinder partnerships are no different than any other type of connection.

In addition to the stigma associated with dating apps, there is a belief that relationships that begin there will not continue or are less serious than those that begin elsewhere. In a recent survey, over half of those polled believe these partnerships are less effective than 'conventional' ones.

When it comes to why and how people use dating apps, different people may have different - and not always good - intentions, but they aren't just for meaningless hook-ups. Many individuals use Tinder or other dating apps to create real relationships. Finding them sometimes takes a lot of swiping and scrolling, but it's not impossible.

It's been precisely three years, one month, and one day since my boyfriend and I met for the first time as I write this post. And this was his very first Tinder date. It turned out to be his last as well.

We didn't start dating right away since we were both living in separate countries at the time, but he relocated to London after our first date, and we've been together ever since.

What began in an unconventional manner evolved into a true, honest, and loving relationship.

We were the lucky winners of the digital love lottery.

Sure, internet dating isn't for everyone, but those who decide to give it a try and discover someone they like shouldn't be ashamed to confess they met through it. It isn't necessary for love to blossom naturally.

While shopping at a farmers market, picking up dry cleaning, or going out for drinks with coworkers, not everyone will meet the love of their life.

We must not be swayed by the stereotypical and often unrealistic rom-com ideas of how things should play out.

Love may strike at any moment and in any place, even the internet.

Finally, some thoughts

It takes time to go back to normal. And, as online dating becomes more mainstream and pervasive in popular culture, the stigma associated with it will fade away.

But, even if it doesn't, I won't be embarrassed to admit that I met my spouse through an app.

Because I would never have met my Italian introvert geek who is oddly worse at preparing pasta than I am if it hadn't been for Tinder.